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- Statistics show that men who kiss their wives goodby in the morning live five years longer than those who don't. Some of you men had better pucker-up before you tucker-out.
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- "Stealing a kiss may be petty larceny, but sometimes it's grand."
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- "Kissing a girl is like opening a jar of olives -- hard to get the first one, but the rest come easy."
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- The difference between a man kissing his sister and a pretty girl is about fifty-five seconds.
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- "A prominent physician says that in fifty years kissing will be unheard of -- but in fifty years, who cares?"
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