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- "If all men are born free, why doesn't somebody tell the hospitals and doctors about it?"
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- Most hospitals are now so expensive that when you're brought in they interview you to see which ailment you can afford to have.
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- Wouldn't it be wonderful to open a few discount hospitals?
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- A hospital should have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office.
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- "If you plan to finance your forthcoming heart attack, it's absolutely necessary that you work ten hours a day, seven days a week."
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