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- "I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved."
- George Gobel
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- A man's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink.
- W.C. Fields
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- "I saw a notice that said "Drink Canada Dry" and I've just started."
- Brendan Behan
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- I envy people who drink -- at least they know what to blame everything on.
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- You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
- Dean Martin
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