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- Nothing destroys the Christmas spirit faster than looking for a place to park.
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- "It's a soul-stirring experience to hear Yule carolers standing in a Los Angeles smog singing, "It Came upon a Midnight Clear.""
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- Christmas is the season when by their fruitcakes shall ye know them.
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- Christmas is the season when you never know which is going to give out first -- your money or your feet.
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- Christmas is the season when everyone goes shopping and mangles with the crowd.
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