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- An atheist is a person who has no visible means of support
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- A good question for an atheist is to serve him a delicious meal and then ask him if he believes there is a cook.
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- "There's a service, similar to Dial-A-Prayer, called Dial-A-Doubt. It's for atheists who aren't sure."
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- Here lies an Atheist: All Dressed Up and No Place to Go.
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- The worst possible moment for an atheist is when he feels grateful and has no one to thank.
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